How to Change the Dating Scene- A Single Woman's Perspective

September 27, 2017 Written By: 

During most of my conversations with my girlfriends we discuss dating, relationships, and of course the horror stories are always in the mix. Instead of focusing on the negative stories, I pulled together a list of things that men are doing right. If you stick to this list you will have a better chance of getting that second, third, and beyond date. 

1.  BE YOU

You’re probably saying "Who else can I be?" but seriously though, this has to be the most important item on the list. You can act like a different person and that may catch someone’s interest but how long can you keep up the act?

For example, if you open car doors, then do that…all the time. But if you do it for the first three dates and on the fourth you hop in the car and leave me standing at the curb I will be shaking my head and wondering what else will you stop doing.

That’s a minor example but believe me, it’s happened with a number of guys.



Once you meet a person, you talk on the phone or text, and you both decide you would like to go out, a woman loves nothing more than a man that will take the initiative and plan a date. This is your opportunity to show her that you were paying attention during your conversations. You may have talked about your favorite places to eat, if she hasn’t tried your favorite restaurant or food truck, take her there.

If she enjoys the outdoors and/or is looking for different ways to workout, go for a hike. Be creative and utilize your local newspapers and websites to find events that are going on in your area. 

For instance, and in the Charlotte North Carolina area are two websites that list upcoming events and activities.



When we decide to meet at 7pm, be there at 6:55pm. If something comes up give as much notice as you can if you need to cancel or reschedule. It’s understandable that you may be late or need to cancel a date, however if it becomes a habit you may not get another opportunity to take this young lady out again.

If you are planning the date, always check your availability and allow enough time in your schedule for travel. For example, don’t plan the date during your busy week at work; carve out time where she will be the focus. Another thing I personally do, add events and dinner plans to the calendar on my cellphone with an alert a few days ahead of time so I don’t forget. The key is to never take someone else’s time for granted.



I’m a huge texter and it’s because I like/need to multitask to get everything done on my "To Do List". But the best way to get to know a person is by physically speaking to them, plus it usually requires a person’s undivided attention. When a man picks up the phone and calls a woman, it leaves an impression because you are making time in your day to get to know her. It also allows you both to learn each other’s tone and sense of humor; which are both extremely hard to learn via text messages.

The dating scene can be difficult to navigate but to master it you should always look internally. Make sure you are willing to put forth the effort and are open to sharing your time with someone else. I truly believe you are what you attract so make sure you are the best you when entering the dating scene. If you keep attracting the same type of person and it’s not the caliber of person you would like to be with, stop and evaluate what energy you are exuding to others.


For more insight like this be sure to check out Drink Til We're Married Podcast.  Follow us on Facebook and Instagram @drinktilweremarried.

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