Pregnancy: The Survival Guide all Fathers-To-Be Need!

October 07, 2017 Written By: 

First off let me say congratulations.  If you’re reading this then chances are you’re about to experience the joy of having a baby.  Well, you won’t physically be having the baby but you get what I mean.  This is an exciting time in a man’s life as he will officially become a father for the first time, or for a subsequent time.

Going through the pregnancy stage with your wife can be wonderful yet nerve racking at the same time.  There are countless books, magazines, and TV shows that women can turn to and get tips and advice on what to expect as they transition through each trimester.  But as far as us fathers-to-be, there are no such outlets for us to use.

Until now.

We here at Virile have gathered a small group of fathers, with each father going through the pregnancy process at least twice, with the purpose of sharing the do’s, the don’ts, and what to expect while dealing with a pregnant woman. 

 Is the process easy? No.  But don’t worry; it’s not as bad as you think.

She Is Going To Be Very Emotional

Be kind hearted. This is the most emotional time in their lives. Her hormones will be up and down with the flick of a switch. Have patience, and DO NOT let it upset you. – Patrick M. (father of two)

Amongst all the things that the fathers mentioned, this by far was the most unanimous talking point across the board.  She is going to be emotional, very emotional.  You can’t blame her though, there is a human being growing inside of her.

My college degree is not in the Science or Medical field so I’ll spare you from having me go into detail, but just know that she is going to be flooded with hormones so as a result her emotions can be all over the place. 

She’ll love you one minute, then a few minutes later she may despise the very thought of you.  She can be happy now, but at the drop of a dime she can burst into tears.  You just never know what will happen next from an emotional standpoint.

Whatever the case may be, be calm.  Be understanding.  Be extra supportive during this time.  She is going through a lot of stress (emotionally, mentally, and physically), so you’ll need to be a calming spirit for her.  Try to be as helpful as possible and just reassure her that you are by her side throughout the entire process.


She Will Have To Use The Restroom, A Lot!

To be more specific, she’s going to have pee FREQUENTLY.  As her uterus expands, more and more pressure will be applied to her bladder.  And as a result, she will literally make trips to the restroom on a constant basis.  Be mindful of this and plan accordingly if you two are out and about; make sure to be close to a restroom at all times.


Give Her Your Input

Your wife may be the one carrying and delivering the child, but the child is yours as well.  Try not to give answers to questions she might ask in regard to the baby such as "Whatever you want" or "It doesn't matter to me".  Give her your input, even if that is just to agree with an idea she has come up with. – Jelani F. (father of two)

You definitely want to be involved in all decisions when it comes to the baby.  Let her know your opinion on things such as selecting a hospital, her diet, what color to paint the nursery, obviously the name of the child, etc. 

You don’t ever want her to feel as if she is alone in having to make decisions.  You always want to be active and hands on.  Even if you may feel indifferent about a particular topic, give her your input anyway!


Food Cravings Are Real

Don’t be surprised if she just randomly starts craving different types of food or deserts all of a sudden.  With the influx of hormones that are going through her body, this will cause her to want to eat certain things that she normally may not eat. 

Her appetite will increase as well because she’s eating for two (or more if she’s having twins, triplets, etc.).  But beware, she is very emotional at this time so she can become extremely moody if she has to wait long to eat.  It wouldn’t be a bad idea to keep some snacks within arm’s reach at all times. 


She Will Not Sleep Comfortably

As she moves along from trimester to trimester, sleeping comfortably is going to be a task for her each and every night.  As the baby grows and shifts around, she will have to shift around as well.  And this can happen all throughout the night so there will be times where she just won’t get a good night’s rest. 

With this in mind, I strongly suggest buying her a maternity pillow or something of that sort to assist her as best as possible to get comfortable.  Not only is this a nice gesture, but she will be appreciative that you have her well-being and comfort in mind.


Go With Her On Doctors’ Appointments

She will have to see her doctor frequently throughout her pregnancy; so if possible try to accompany her to as many doctors’ appointments as you can.  Not only will this keep you abreast to your baby’s progress, but it will give her the support she needs.  

You’ll want to be familiar with her medical staff in the event of an emergency or if you have any questions. 


Compliment Her

I don’t know what it is, but my wife looks so radiant and beautiful while pregnant.  I just can’t explain it. – David W. (father of three)

Let’s be honest, when you think of sexy a pregnant woman might not be the first thing that comes to mind.  But oddly enough, your wife will become more and more sexy to you as she transitions through her pregnancy. 

So let her know that she looks good!

As she starts to put on some pounds due to the baby, she may not feel as physically confident as a result.  You have to be her biggest cheerleader during this time; compliment her.  Show her that you love her.  Let her know that you still find her attractive. 


Take On Additional House Duties

Pregnancy affects each woman differently; it may go smoothly for some but difficult for others.  The closer she gets to her delivery date however, the normal task that she does on a daily basis will be harder for her to complete.  This is a perfect opportunity for you to step in and take as much of a load off her shoulders as possible.  Whether it’s handling the cooking, cleaning, or taking care of the other children in the family; make a valiant effort to eliminate any chores from her to-do list. 


Pack An Overnight Bag For Her, And You

My wife went into labor almost two weeks before her due date.  She had her bag packed and ready for the hospital; me on the other hand, I only had the clothes on my back.  I was totally unprepared. – Carlos G. (father of two)

During the first few doctor’s visits, the expected due date will be determined.  The key word to keep in mind here is “expected”.  Nobody can tell you exactly what day the baby will be born with 100% accuracy; generally whatever date is given will have a before and after window of two weeks.

So for example if the due date is June 15th, pretty much the baby can be born at any time during that entire month!

To not get caught in a situation where you’re rushing to the hospital empty handed, be sure to have with you a bag packed with overnight items at all times.  Have the bag ready at least two weeks ahead of the due date and it may be a good idea to keep it in the trunk of your car or someplace that you know you can get to fairly quickly; especially if you live quite a ways away from the hospital.


Be Calm And Don’t Panic

It is to be expected that you will be extremely nervous once the time comes for the baby to be delivered.  But at this time is when your wife will need you the most to support her.  The pain she will experience will be intense and she will have to endure this pain for hours upon hours. 

Us men are lucky that this is something we’ll never go through, but your poise during this process will in turn help her get through this as best as possible.  Be sure to talk to her and give her words of encouragement.  Hold her hand or rub her back to show comfort.  Be a calming presence to her. 


These tips will definitely come in handy throughout the nine months your wife is pregnant.  Enjoy it because it is a beautiful experience.  Congratulations once again!

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